Pre-Relationship - Be Your Own Detective

Warning Signs!
Linea Sinclair: "You meet someone. You fall in love and you get married. The next thing you know
the guy has other wives or he has a criminal history or he's ripped people off
for years! It's a sad, sad thing to take something beautiful like love and turn
it into something tragic.
"In Florida, there are a high percentage of retirees, many of whom are widowed
or divorced. They may have had a business up north. They come here with
considerable assets. They buy a condo. They meet someone and fall in love. God
bless them, may we all fall in love again, someday. When you meet someone, ask:
'Do they want me or do they want my money."
Certain clues may manifest themselves as early warning signs, especially when a
relationship is just beginning to take shape. Be aware of the indicators that
warn of trouble ahead. Your safety, your money, your happiness - may be at
stake. |
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For all practical purposes, a pre-relationship, or pre-nuptial, pre- commitment
investigation - whatever you choose to call it - is essentially a
Complete Background Check or an
Identify
Check. A probe into the background of a self-employed person or business
owner would be considered a
Business Background Check.
Become a Private Investigator with our Private
Investigator Home Training course.
Secrets of
Top Private Eyes.
Read More>
Order a Complete Background Check. or
Order an Identify Check Experienced database search specialists will
immediately go to work for you, to quickly return real, meaningful results.
See our Sample Report
Lies
People lie most about whether they are married. They lie about their occupation,
their education, and their financial worth. This information can be discovered
or confirmed by running our
Extensive Background Check.
Before a woman gets involved, she should want to know: Is the guy married with
five kids hidden away somewhere? Financially, is he well-off? Vagueness,
Evasiveness: These traits tip you off. The manifestation of either of these
less-than-desirable attributes should alert you to at least the possibility of
deception.
Suspicion: One of Mother Nature's most overlooked and
underrated defense mechanisms is suspicion, which manifests itself strongest
when one perceives one is being lied to. If you suspect something is
wrong, something is probably wrong.
Can you answer
these questions?
- Do you know where your mate lives?
- Have you met the family? Friends?
- Where and when does everybody get together?
- Do you have a home phone number for this significant other?
If the individual in question is married or has other secrets to hide, you
may get a work number, a friend's number, or the excuse, "I don't have a phone."
Do you get subterfuge, excuses, and false information when you ask for personal
facts?
Confirm Suspicions
If you suspect something is out of kilter, no matter the vagueness of your
suspicions, consider conducting a
Our
Pre-Relationship Background Check!.
Watch out if the individual claims to never have been married before. Or you've
never been to their home. They'll make excuse. They'll come to your house
instead. And they're never able to stay with you very long. Then, all of a
sudden, they're able to stay with you on a weekend, but that's it.
Does what you know - or rather, what you don't know - leave you feeling
ill-at-ease and dissatisfied with parts of the relationship?
P.I. Roger Gibson: "You'll know after a while if someone is being truthful with
you or not. If a person is evasive and doesn't give you a good answer when
questioned directly, you'll get a feeling about it. He's not available on
weekends. She's never met his family. He only has a telephone in his car; no
home phone. She doesn't know where he lives. 'I'll come to your place,' he says.
It'll be a very one-sided type of relationship, and she senses this. 'I haven't
met his family,' she confides. We've been dating for a year and he never talks
about marriage . . ."
"Pimping"
Pimping is a term P.I.s use to describe a method of gathering information by
enlisting a friend or relative to find out what you need to know: Invite your
subject to dinner at your parent's home or to a get-together with your friends.
Or arrange for your associates to meet the two of you somewhere, 'by chance.'
Let them rake the suspect over the coals.
You can ask questions without the person knowing the reasons behind the
questions. You just have to be sneaky about it. Where are you from? What do you
do for a living? How long have you been an attorney? Where did you go to school?
Are you married?
Order a Complete Background Check!. Experienced database search specialists
will immediately go to work for you, to quickly return real, meaningful results.
See our Sample Report
Your Investigation
- Public Records
Since you won't have the advantage of a filled-out employment application, and
consequently, permission to delve into the person's credit history, you'll have
to dig for the data.
What premarital work can be for anyone is a basic background investigation. Is
this person truly divorced or widowed, as they say they are? That's probate
records, that's civil court records: divorces. Is this person from where they
say they're from? Have they spent their life there? Call up county records. Do
they own property there? It's public records. Is this person really in this
business? Is he or she really a CPA? Call up the accounting board. Every state
has an accounting board. If you start getting a lot of negative answers to these
questions, let him pay for your drink, but don't marry him.
Marriage and Divorce Records
Do a marriage check. Find out if the divorce actually went through. Those who
set out to deceive tend to be people who come from a very distant state or from
out of the county. They'll be very sketchy about their backgrounds, their
families. They won't go into detail. They'll say 'You don't really want to hear
about that.' Or, 'My wife suffered a tragic death.' She's not dead; she's alive.
It's tragic, but she's not dead.
If you locate a spouse or former spouse, you may decide to question that person
about your mate. Brace yourself for answers and opinions not available from any
records source or Information Provider.
You might want to contact the ex-wife. Check divorce records, find out where
they got the divorce. Pull up the record. You'll find her name. Look her up and
give her a call.
Interviews with People
Once you have your mate's address and place of employment, you can decide who to
talk to. Neighbors, their addresses and telephone numbers, are easy to look up
in cris-cross directories. Or can be checked on-line or by using one of several
CD phone directories. City property records will indicate the landlord of a
given address. Employers will often verify employment. Co-workers, if approached
with decorum and for an acceptable reason like an old debt you're finally able
to pay off), will gladly volunteer information. Former spouses or mates will
often tell you everything you want to know-and maybe a few things you don't
want to know!
Surveillance
You may find it necessary to conduct a surveillance to determine whether your
suspicions are valid. Try to remember that it is very difficult to conduct a
surveillance a person who knows you. Enlist the help of a trusted friend or hire
a pro.
See Surveillance
for complete information and techniques.
Continue Your
Investigation
To learn how to conduct a complete background investigation, you will benefit
most if you understand what records are available to you on every level and what
information certain records contain. Consult
Public Records
to familiarize yourself with various resources and what's available in
Local,
County,
State
and
National
records. Consult these records yourself for websites and contact information for
these agencies refer to the
State Directory and
National Directory
Order a Complete Background Check!. Experienced database search specialists
will immediately go to work for you, to quickly return real, meaningful results.
See our Sample Report
Become a Private Investigator with our Private
Investigator Home Training course.
Secrets of
Top Private Eyes.
Read More> |
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